The Effects of Grief on the Body
“Coming to understand the physical effects of grief helps us get a better picture of our own or a loved one’s grief experience. When we take the bird’s eye view of grief, we’re able to award ourselves and others the compassion necessary to be on the grief journey free of shame while we make meaning from our loss.”
It’s no secret that grief has a propensity for ravaging the mind and spirit. It takes a significant toll on the mental state of the bereaved as they seek to fill a hole that we know can never be filled in the same size and shape of the person lost.
But did you know that grief is actually a full-body experience? One that has physical effects, as well as mental and emotional?
As I often discuss at length, grief is a multifaceted emotion that never looks the same for two people. It is stigmatized, and as a result, understood by few. Therefore, it’s wise to latch onto any ounce of understanding we can so that we can better know grief and work to see it in a compassionate light.
Five Physical Symptoms of Grief
Coming to understand the physical effects of grief helps us get a better picture of our own or a loved one’s grief experience. When we take the bird’s eye view of grief, we’re able to award ourselves and others the compassion necessary to be on the grief journey free of shame while we make meaning from our loss.
Lack of Energy: One of the most recognizable physical symptoms of grief is the absence of any sort of energy. While the mere act of existing in grief can be a drain on one’s energy, grief often prompts sleep deprivation, as well. Sleep is when the brain and body typically rests and repairs, but when one is grieving, sleep can be hard to come by, and subsequently, so can the body’s opportunity to rejuvenate. Alternatively, a person might just as well sleep more as a temporary respite from the pain of losing someone dear, which can also throw off the body’s natural rhythms and result in chronic exhaustion. A stint of insomnia, oversleeping, or low energy are all normal while grieving, but persistence should be brought to a doctor or licensed professional.
Low Immunity: In the midst of grief, our stress hormones often struggle to maintain balance. When this happens, our ability to produce white blood cells decreases, in effect leaving us susceptible to illness. This is why grieving individuals will often catch recurring colds or come down with a stomach bug during intense periods of grieving.
Body Aches and Pains: Again, our stress hormones can really take a toll on us— During intense grief periods, our stress hormones release in the hundreds, effectively stunning any muscles they come into contact with. This can result in back pain, persistent headaches, joint pain, or overall stiffness. Again, this should be temporary as your body tapers back the release of stress hormones over time, but any persistence in the matter should be brought to a licensed professional.
Digestive Issues: The digestive tract is one of the more sensitive areas of the body, especially in response to stress. Additionally, it is common for individuals to seek comfort in food or to entirely lose their appetite due to anxiety. Any combination of these can result in irritable bowel syndrome, purging, nausea, or inability to stomach food, all which should be brought to a licensed professional if experienced for a lengthy duration.
Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms: Grief can also prompt reaching for unhealthy coping mechanisms that have their own reciprocal physical effects, such as smoking or drinking. While these vices might provide temporary and false comfort for a time, they can have long-lasting, damaging effects on the body.
There are a number of other symptoms that could manifest while grieving, which is such a testament to the incredible “human machines” that we are— capable of experiencing emotions to the effect that they interweave into every fiber of our being. But most importantly, it can be frustrating and uncomfortable to experience physical symptoms when the emotional weight is already significant enough.
How to Take Care of Your Body While Grieving
For this reason, it’s extremely important to pay special attention to your mind, spirit, AND body when experiencing grief. The mind-body connection is strong, but what has been thrown off course can just as well be righted with patience, self-compassion, self-care, and the help of a grief professional.
Be sure to listen (and respond!) to your body’s needs. If you need rest, rest. If you need nourishment, nourish your body. If you need a day in bed, take a day in bed.
Mitigate the physical effects as much as you can by getting exercise, sunshine, and rest. Continue your routines to provide your mind and body as much “normalcy” as possible in a less-than-normal time, and focus on eating multiple small meals during the day if a traditional meal pattern of three times a day feels daunting right now.
Most of all, know that you are allowed to ask for help. This is a difficult time, and the physical symptoms that come with grief don’t make it any easier on you. With the guidance of a grief counselor, you can navigate the full-body experience with a better understanding of what’s happening and how to cope. Contact me today to learn more.